Since 1919

The Prairie News

Since 1919

The Prairie News

Since 1919

The Prairie News

A Letter To Sir: one soldier’s heartbreaking story

A+Letter+To+Sir%3A+one+soldier%E2%80%99s+heartbreaking+story

Too often I find people don’t appreciate the real struggle our military go through. A close friend of mine recently had a tragic experience that she shared with me. I wrote this for her but also to remind people that young men and women our age sacrifice so much so that we can be free.

A Letter To Sir
I was told you once held me in your arms. I was told you once cried for me. I was told you once said that I was your world.Where did those things go?I remember crying when I heard you were leaving. I begged you to stay. I remember crying as I watched you get on that plane. Mom held me in place.
I remember asking Mom for days when you would be home. All she would say is soon. But you never came home. My dad never came home, a soldier did. That’s when I started calling you Sir.
I didn’t know who you were, but you weren’t my dad.You didn’t laugh with me. You didn’t sit and talk. You weren’t there for me anymore. Where were you for all those softball games? My dance recital? Where were you when I needed you? Why did I have to sit and watch the father daughter dance alone? Why couldn’t you be there to sweep me off my feet?
So long you were gone, and still I’m searching for you. I started looking for your approval long ago. I came to you and said that I had decided to join the military. You looked at me and said that my country would be proud. But what about you, dad? Won’t it make you proud? I left two weeks later.
Mom cried, you simply said goodbye. For weeks I didn’t talk to you. For weeks I suffered through, just for you. How badly I wanted to come home, but I stayed hoping to make you proud. Two weeks, four weeks, seven weeks-  it seemed endless but then graduation was just a week away. One more week until I could talk to you, I was counting down the days.
I got a call just five days until graduation, I wasn’t supposed to you aren’t allowed. Not unless something was terribly wrong.
My  mom cried for an eternity before she could speak the news. You took your life, you couldn’t bear it anymore. You said you had nothing else to live for. But what about me, dad? Wasn’t I enough for you? Didn’t I make you proud? Why wasn’t I good enough?
I went home to attend your funeral. There was a note, they said written just for me.
“Daughter, my angel, my soldier. What a woman you have grown up to be. I can’t tell you how much I love you. All these years I’ve watched you grow. All that time I lost, watching from afar.
How was I supposed to hold you, when I was trying to hold myself together? How was I supposed to be there for you, when I had taken that opportunity away from others to do the same with their daughters? How do I live with myself, knowing that so many have died because of me?
Darling, I know you might not understand but this life is just no longer for me. But here is what I want to tell you before I go. Finally being the father I should have been. Sweetheart, never underestimate yourself. You are stronger than any enemy you will every come up against as long as you believe.
Don’t ever give up your faith, when no one is covering your back, God will. War will change you, but never lose who you really are. You will need her when you come home. Keep your friends close but your enemies closer. They may come in handy.
Most importantly, never forget to love. Love yourself, love with everything you are. When you lose the love in your heart, you have lost the war.
Just as I have. But I could never lose the love I have for you. I rocked you in my arms when you were a baby and you were my whole world. I look at you and I still see you there.
Just know my loving daughter, that I have always, always been proud of you.”

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